It's hard to make time for blogging when you can't get on the computer until after 9:30 pm (which is the average time that Dallin falls asleep these days)! I have several posts that are pretty well organized in my mind, but when computer time comes, I'm too exhausted to actually write anything.
Next week it will make one whole month that we've done away with computer and TV during the week. I guess it's time for an update. The first week, as I wrote before, was divine. Completely, unexpectedly divine! The rest of the weeks? Well, I'm not sure how to categorize them. In some ways, things have gone really well. Dallin either asks for or complains about the lack of TV at least once a day. But usually not more than twice a day. So that is much better then I ever dreamed of. The kids are generally keeping themselves busy with other activities. I am not missing the computer (too much), though I know the habit is still lurking under the surfarce, because the two times I've found myself home alone with no one to be accountable to, I've been unable to resist getting online. Maybe in another two months the addiction will be broken???
The one thing that hasn't really improved like I'd hoped is the behavior/moodiness issues we'd been having. I was hoping that the lack of screen time would magically solve all the problems with backtalking and tantrums that have plagued certain family members who shall remain nameless. Nope. In fact, it's been worse. So now we're exploring more of the other suspicion I've had about behavior--diet. I tried keeping a log of what a certain child ate and how that corresponded with the said child's moods. But keeping a log is kind of a big pain, so that only lasted about one day.
Yesterday was a really rough day. Dallin and Sariah fought and picked at each other from the moment they got up until the moment they went to bed. I used to feel so good about the fact that my children got along so well. But now I realize that it was just because Sariah was too little to make any waves. Now she's not too little any more. And she is becoming a master at making waves and pushing buttons, Dallin's buttons, to be specific. Oh. my. goodness, there are days I want to just crawl in a hole from all the picking! (Like, every day lately....)
We also had more than a few moments between mother and children. I can't say it was only sibling rivalry. Certain people got sent to their rooms more than once (which is a "consequence" I really try to avoid). There were tantrums and mouthing off and whining and plenty of other related behaviors.
It did occur to me around dinner time, when James and I could barely keep from laughing (because it was either laugh or scream) at the absurdity of it all as we sat around the dinner table watching BOTH children cry, for different reasons, at the same time, that they had had a lot of sugar that afternoon. And not really any healthy snacks. And maybe there really was something to this idea that spikes and crashes in blood sugar levels could cause moodiness and other related problems. (Yeah, I kind of fell off the "snack tray" bandwagon after the first week.) So today I made it a point to make sure we all had healthy snacks, with protein, at regular intervals. And it made a difference--we all had a wonderful, fantastic, mellow, happy day! I think it also might have had a lot to do with the pleading prayer I offered before I went to bed last night, telling God what a failure I was and begging for help and inspiration to figure out how to parent both of my children in general and one of them in particular.
So I know I need to look further into this Little Sugar Addicts program, which book is currently in my possession. But the question is "when???" Life isn't slowing down one bit in July, in fact, it's gearing up to be even more crazy with three birthdays (and the attendant birth family letters, homemade gifts that I've already bought all the supplies for, and home-decorated birthday cakes), one family reunion, two holidays, one Relief Society lesson, two Sundays of playing the organ in sacrament meeting, and oodles of practicing and preparation for the organ workshop coming up in just a month. Yeah, this is just the time to start yet another intensive "family improvement" project around here.
Sigh.
Next week it will make one whole month that we've done away with computer and TV during the week. I guess it's time for an update. The first week, as I wrote before, was divine. Completely, unexpectedly divine! The rest of the weeks? Well, I'm not sure how to categorize them. In some ways, things have gone really well. Dallin either asks for or complains about the lack of TV at least once a day. But usually not more than twice a day. So that is much better then I ever dreamed of. The kids are generally keeping themselves busy with other activities. I am not missing the computer (too much), though I know the habit is still lurking under the surfarce, because the two times I've found myself home alone with no one to be accountable to, I've been unable to resist getting online. Maybe in another two months the addiction will be broken???
The one thing that hasn't really improved like I'd hoped is the behavior/moodiness issues we'd been having. I was hoping that the lack of screen time would magically solve all the problems with backtalking and tantrums that have plagued certain family members who shall remain nameless. Nope. In fact, it's been worse. So now we're exploring more of the other suspicion I've had about behavior--diet. I tried keeping a log of what a certain child ate and how that corresponded with the said child's moods. But keeping a log is kind of a big pain, so that only lasted about one day.
Yesterday was a really rough day. Dallin and Sariah fought and picked at each other from the moment they got up until the moment they went to bed. I used to feel so good about the fact that my children got along so well. But now I realize that it was just because Sariah was too little to make any waves. Now she's not too little any more. And she is becoming a master at making waves and pushing buttons, Dallin's buttons, to be specific. Oh. my. goodness, there are days I want to just crawl in a hole from all the picking! (Like, every day lately....)
We also had more than a few moments between mother and children. I can't say it was only sibling rivalry. Certain people got sent to their rooms more than once (which is a "consequence" I really try to avoid). There were tantrums and mouthing off and whining and plenty of other related behaviors.
It did occur to me around dinner time, when James and I could barely keep from laughing (because it was either laugh or scream) at the absurdity of it all as we sat around the dinner table watching BOTH children cry, for different reasons, at the same time, that they had had a lot of sugar that afternoon. And not really any healthy snacks. And maybe there really was something to this idea that spikes and crashes in blood sugar levels could cause moodiness and other related problems. (Yeah, I kind of fell off the "snack tray" bandwagon after the first week.) So today I made it a point to make sure we all had healthy snacks, with protein, at regular intervals. And it made a difference--we all had a wonderful, fantastic, mellow, happy day! I think it also might have had a lot to do with the pleading prayer I offered before I went to bed last night, telling God what a failure I was and begging for help and inspiration to figure out how to parent both of my children in general and one of them in particular.
So I know I need to look further into this Little Sugar Addicts program, which book is currently in my possession. But the question is "when???" Life isn't slowing down one bit in July, in fact, it's gearing up to be even more crazy with three birthdays (and the attendant birth family letters, homemade gifts that I've already bought all the supplies for, and home-decorated birthday cakes), one family reunion, two holidays, one Relief Society lesson, two Sundays of playing the organ in sacrament meeting, and oodles of practicing and preparation for the organ workshop coming up in just a month. Yeah, this is just the time to start yet another intensive "family improvement" project around here.
Sigh.
Comments
Drumroll:
Siblings. Fight. They just do. They always have. And always will. I'm not saying that we just let them have at it, but I don't beat myself up about it either. It's how they learn to get along with people so they'll be great coworkers, neighbors, etc when they are adults. In fact, from now on, I'm going to take the stance that sibling (ok and parent) rivalry is crucial to their development and I'm not going to unnecessarily inhibit their learning opportunities. Maybe there is a blog post about this somewhere...
We've had two really good days, so I'm feeling better!
I agree with Linnea-all these fights-and even like you mentioned....moodiness and backtalking-prepare us to be better people. We learn we can't talk a certain way to grown ups(or friends) or how to react to situations. This was and is an easy concept for my oldest to understand but my 7 year old is a different kid totally. He is such a diamond in the rough! And everytime I am ready to beat him I remember he is just 7 and he doesn't know how to talk/react/respond/handle each situation....yet. Hopefully he will learn before he is 18!
Good luck Lisa...all you can do sometimes is laugh isn't it!